Cassiel C. MacAvity

    Let us consider some guy who is an authority on mineral synaptic enhancement, that is, he can stand next to granite and make granite look intelligent. Let us consider him to the point that we can actually see him standing right here before us, standing in the vicinity of a quartet of other people. Of his intellect, or the lack thereof, we know this of him because he claims that not only are guns the only form of viable protection, but that "Real Men(TM) Gotta Have This Or That, Only A Real Man(TM) Can Do This Or That, etc.", and who also goes and notes that should he run into Someone In Particular who has three girlfriends---Yes, this is the particular quartet, and yes, the S.I.P. is dating the three at the same time, the three're bi and also dating each other as well as the S.I.P., no, the S.I.P. is Not three timing---is that as the S.I.P. is only one man, then Obviously that S.I.P. is just not capable of protecting the three girls from, y'know, a Real Man(TM), who may decide to Step In, have his own interest in one or more of the three women, like that one there, that blonde girl over there, especially when the Real Man(TM), bein' a Real Man(TM), does indeed have His Own Weapon---

    During this time that the Real Man(TM) is babbling away, at this point the blonde member of the trio of women does step in closer as the brunette of the three women just stands there, looks at the Real Man(TM) .

---"'An maybe some Real Man(TM) like, say,"---

    The brunette is now holding a snubnose magnum revolver, pointing it at the clear threat being offered by the Real Man(TM).

---"Now waitaminnit"---

    The blonde now has her personal pointed razor out and is pointing at an eye of the Real Man(TM) at a very close distance as the other blonde of the three women also has Her personal semi-auto pointed at the Real Man(TM) from easily five feet away. The second blonde clicks the safety off for emphasis.

    The nearby blonde, the one with the knife, does a fast frisk of the Real Man(TM) and drops a pistol and a couple of ammo magazines on the ground.

    The S.I.P., the boyfriend of the three women, the one that the Real Man(TM) had been talking about, finally announces;

    "Oh . . "

    "I'm supposed to be protective . . . . "

    "Ok . . ."

    At that point he finally pulls out his own large calibre semi-auto, pops the magazine out, pulls the slide and catches the bullet, and drops all that ammo into a coat pocket. Showing the blondes the gut end of the pistol, they both peer into the chamber and then announce "Clear." He then holds up his empty hand, which is "obviously" holding a pistol magazine, which he inserts into the pistol, after which he lets the slide click forward. Leaving the hammer pulled back, he then places the muzzle of the "loaded" pistol directly between the eyes of the The Real M---Yeah, ok, the undeniable mere noisy and childish git---and asks;

    "So . . . Um . . . What were you saying about women not only being unable to protect themselves but not being allowed to?"


© 1998 Cassiel C. MacAvity